Wierd Chick Miss-Spelling

I don’t know about the Weird Chick

At least not at this particular moment.

She is an archetype – the main archetype- with whom I can identify

As the original Misstic, Missbehaving thinker, Missunderstood artist,

The Missfit everywhere she goes- not quite this, not quite that,

Usually only partially fitting the dictionary definition

Of Anachronistic, Bohemmienne, Counterculture, Deviant;

Which reminds me to beware of overidentification.

Perhaps it is this attachment which caused recent bouts- of what, I don’t know-

During the long nights when I would mentally or electronically devise letters never sent

To people who imaginarily cast me- us- out. Touching shadows that danced,

I tried to get at what was casting them,

And sometimes found a defenseless silly man behind the curtain,

While other times my hand grasped at air.

I wondered, was the shadow itself even real to any but myself?

No, what Jung identified in his Red Book was indeed real if only in our unconscious.

In the divining time between All Souls Eve and the Sun Son’s ReBirth,

There were flashes- bouts and flashes-

Bouts of fear that the dark in all its brands will remain,

Flashes of illumination now realized from now passed moments-

Oh, and rumination over harvesting

The heirloom perennials and exotic native annuals I’ve planted and will eventually market.

Right now, as the sun is only re beginning to lengthen its presence in this hemisphere,

The time of not knowing inner wisdom is coming to an end again.

Time to spin the indefinable into some kind of order

Identifying the spark- the Singularity- the Singular- that is the Wierd Chick

Getting at the core of who She-is, perhaps who Sidhe is, one of her otherworldly sources

Peeling away the layers to the duckling, the PreRaphaelite, the Creatrix and more

Manifesting her forms in myself as Adoptee, New Waver, Costume Shop Babe, and beyond

Connecting the webs from Misstery, History, and Myth

To the present day Wierd Chicks who may or may not

Kick Ass, Mine Wizarding Wisdom, Dance into Madness…

Who are, who do, who represent so much more

Than the misfit version of a heroine, ingénue, mother, crone

Spinning into whatever the next and the next and the next

Cycles and orders of Wierd may be.

Weird connects us all; Wierd is a unique creation that doesn’t quite fit.

Even though some may simply see a Miss-Spelling,

Those who identify will take time to recognize more.

To the Wierd Chick in me, and in you who choose to follow her call.

Emergence in 'The Cat Returns'

The other night, my husband and I watched another Studio Ghibli film, The Cat Returns, a deceptively amusing film about a teenage girl, Haru, who can talk to cats.

http://www.onlineghibli.com/cat_returns/char.php

For me, the film is rife with themes of her development and emerging Animus.

First, of course the cat has an obvious, oftentimes more 'bawdy' or demeaning reference to the female anatomy. However, most if the primary 'cat' characters in the film are male- except one. Yuki was the first cat that Haru ever communicated with. As a child, Yuki was a stray kitten following Haru home. Haru kindly gives Yuki the rest of her fish cookies to eat. Yuki remembers this kindness and her gestures are ultimately instrumental in Haru's escape from the Cat King's intended fate. This in a sense, represents Haru's primal self - her ego that will help navigate the way instead of allowing the Animus (whether the 'good' Baron or the 'bad' king) to take over completely.
As for the male cats: the Cat King is a lazy, mad, gluttonous, dictatorial (albeit funny) beast who doesn't take 'no' for an answer. (Sidenote-What is great is he is voiced in English by Tim Curry who gives him a kind of soulful beatnick flair, saying things like 'yeah, babe.' )
A counterpoint to this cat is the cultured Baron who is really a cat figurine come to life. He is everything the Cat King is not- truly suave, intellectual, tasteful- I cant believe I am saying this about a cat who wears clothes! Anyway, these 2 represent 2 choices that Haru has: stay in the Cat Kingdom- which in some ways is a pleasant and easy escape, or to take the risk of returning to the real world and her mundane life where she is perpetually late to school and will surely have to struggle with all the 'real' issues of growing up.

This film is charming and silly and is great for a lighthearted view with kids- esp if they are 8-12 year old girls. But, older teens and adults can enjoy Miyazake's innumerable talents for symbol and storytelling if they decide to look a little deeper.

image credit: http://media.photobucket.com/image/the%20cat%20returns/CatsShadow16/the_cat_returns-haru-umbrella.png#!oZZ6QQcurrentZZhttp%3A%2F%2Fmedia.photobucket.com%2Fimage%2Fthe%20cat%20returns%2Fpinkfolks%2Fcat.jpg%3Fo%3D6

Wo/Man

The better part of the past 2 years I have become more acquainted with my animus. You know who that is; its the often shadowy part of our personality that carries opposite sex characteristics. As each person defines gender differently, this aspect varies from person to person. It is the character in our dreams that shapeshifts- savior, lover, demon, greenman... artist, professor, poet, priest...
I have realized this part of myself from delving into things I love but had forgotten their power to inspire. They take the form of Jane Austen's heroes; the spark that urges me to bead, sew, write; the dragon who aims its fire at those who stand up as opponents to the higher cause.

In this form I have found synchronicities in those who I find with devastated egos too weak to stand up to their strong demon/lover/angel who has manifested as more real than 'reality'. I have found it in the lost youth that is 'quarterlife crisis'- a very real phenomenon. I have found joy and insight in understanding more of what it means for my husband to be a man- both in the past and now in the present. That is a lifelong lessen I will enjoy seeing unfold!

I found recently I'd had several dragon/devil dreams and was initially a bit fearful of this theme. I have found several answers- you know, the kind of answers that take up too many words and have more of a wordless form in one's psyche. One worth noting is that it is a warning for me to take this part of myself seriously and to be vigilant to not allow it to have 'the keys' to my vessel, my ego, my person. Taking it seriously also means to understand how my light may manifest and to not engage in the black magic/drama that is trying to control others.

This insight arose out of a dream where I was in a classroom where an attractive male 40 something high school teacher sat back and allowed gang members in his classroom to seek blood vengeance. He knew the seeds he could plant would not fully germinate there. They would manifest as these kids got older. He knew it was not for him to break up a fight- at very least it would be fruitless, at most, fatal.

This wisdom has recently been reflected by wise women in my life like Patricia Ballantine and Marie-Sometimes, it is for me to just be the light and hold the light somewhere. And, always, it is best to be aware and take seriously the attempts by others to control. Sometimes I should stand up, but other times it is appropriate to say nothing and just let my light shine.

The shadow- and animus- it would seem, has a glittery cast when one chooses to allow it to reveal itself. Indeed it is the gold in the shit after which Jungians perpetually seek.

Love lies in the Constriction as well as the Expansion

As light diminishes and dark increases again on the wheel, I find the balance to be magnified in life

Dreams again are taking on a bigger feel

Synchronicities are more prevalent

As the balance of light and dark are magnified,

I have been made more aware of how this manifests in life

We thought we’d have to put Chewey to sleep but instead had a costly and challenging surgery – now he has no l eye but seems to be more well again.

My husband Dewell had a power sprayer stolen from his paint trailer, but at least he didn’t have anything worth thousands of dollars stolen.

We got a leak upstairs to top of our week but at least we didn’t have to pay anyting but ~ 40 for the part and Dewell will trade the labor.

We have been reminded that in the balance of events for the past week, although the challenge was great, we could, in each case, count our blessings.

We were reminded of the Taoist fable and we say "We'll see..."

As such, as my dear friend Patricia reminded recently,

in this Libra energy, we can be tossed about on the ends of the teeter totter or we can walk closer to the center balance.

Finally, as the year moves into ever greater darkness once again, I am reminded:

Love lies in the constriction;

It means that suffering comes without bidding or reason

We cannot control the context, or the initial feelings we have when the wound of suffering is inflicted

However we can move in quickly to triage the suffering- buffering with analgesic comforts of loved ones, binding with the transcendence of Love and Meaning. We can administer in a disciplined manner the healing potions of ongoing supports, meaning making, pushing through to do what needs to be done in the moment, and the equal task of attending to lower level needs without judgment until we are released to again attend to those higher level needs.

And then the healing begins.

The pains of illness, wounds, financial setbacks, and the like, are surely challenges. However in the scope of the depths in Life, they are illusory in comparison to the invitation that Live and the Divine makes:

To focus on Love, on Meaning, on not judging but being Aware, on attending and protecting but not harming.

These are the themes on the Journey, whether it be a portion of the Journey filled with vacations or whether it be into the depths of Mordor to bear the ring unto the depths of the Earth.

Articles of Transformation

Since about April of this year, I have been engaging in further exploration of gratitude as the motivation for my creations. I have been privileged to take part in a gathering of women who meets monthly for sharing in process, content, mystery, creation, and the transmutation of things. They have provided profoundly present and loving supports for my own work and recapitulation. This moved in me a sense of gratitude to give to them something in turn for what they have given me.

What I have done with each is to take something/s that the woman loves but is at a loss to use it in its current incarnation.

Mary had a bunch of beloved shirts that I transformed into a sexy sporty hippie ensemble.



The women have given me wonderful feedback: amazement at the skill/ideas, appreciation of the aesthetics, and reports of the compliments the work elicits.

For Deborah, I took a necklace that she didn't wear anymore, dismantling it and refashioning it with copper, lapis, carnelian, mother of pearl, amazonite, garnet, chalcedony and glass (and other?) beads as well as with some copper wrapping and hand made findings. This piece is a tryptic and can be worn as necklace/s and/or bracelet/s or as a belt.


This work has enabled me to recapitulate issues I have carried with me about art, creativity, what to 'do' with my abilities, and how to develop them (among other things).

For Janel, I took a dear purse of her grandmother's and painted on the metallic art nouveau flower and swirls, then adding silver leaf to the gold for a 2 tone effect.


Right now I am on a sabbatical, having created a couple of things for myself, and in the process of altering a couple of Indian Peasant clothing items.
I will soon resume my work for these ladies. 3 to go! After which, I plan to offer my service in energetic exchange to others. Anyone interested in some heirloom alchemy?